I wish the rain would wash away this pain.... I find myself so out of balance lately. Mentally, physically, and emotionally.... all out of whack.

I used to practice martial arts and was recently asked if I still practice... my reply was no, I don't have enough balance for martial arts any more. Then later I was thinking about that conversation and realized that I wasn't just physically out of balance... I don't have the mental balance that it takes either.

Emotionally.... wow... that's like a rollercoaster ride that never ends. up---down---loop, loop, loop----then do it all over again. The rails are getting rusty and the wheels are beginning to squeek... I just pray they keep on moving as the view over the edge...well...that's pretty scary.

I find myself back on the edge lately.... looking down and never seeing bottom. I think about going over the edge... but since I don't know where the bottom is... I just stand with my toes over the edge....remembering to just breathe.